A bit of creative writing ,LOL
I laughed out loud at these last night,, and I think Sil thought I had lost more of my marbles ,,
"What follows is a list of similes taken from actual high school
essays and brought to our attention by U.S. radio honcho and e-mail pen pal Bob Dearborn. These fabulous-if not entirely
successful-forays into the great mysteries of the English language
made some people around here laugh so hard that we felt obligated to
"So yes, Virginia, real students actually wrote the following
sentences and, what's more, signed their names to their papers
afterward. Read on."
1. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like
a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one
of those boxes with the pinhole in it and now goes around the country
speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar
eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
2. She caught your eye like one of those pointy hook latches that
used to dangle from screen doors and would fly up whenever you banged
the door open again.
3. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a
bowling ball wouldn't.
4. McBride fell 12 storeys, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag
filled with vegetable soup.
5. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an
eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city
and Jeopardy comes on at 7p.m. instead of 7:30.
6. Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.
7. Bob was as perplexed as a hacker who means to access
"T:flw.quid55328.comaaakk/ch@ung" but gets "T:quidaaakk/ch@ung" by
8. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
9. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when
you fry them in hot grease.
10. Long separated by cruel fate, the starcrossed lovers raced across
the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one
having left Cleveland at 6:36p.m. travelling at 55 m.p.h., the other
from Topeka at 4:19p.m. at a speed of 35 m.p.h.
11. The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the period after the
Dr. on a Dr. Pepper can.
12. They lived in a typical suburban neighbourhood with picket fences
that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.
13. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who
had also never met.
14. The thunder was ominous sounding, much like the sound of a thin
sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a
15. The red brick wall was the colour of a brick-red Crayola crayon.
16. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was
the East River.
17. Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap,
only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.
18. The door had been forced, as forced as the dialogue during the
interview portion of Jeopardy.
19. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike
Phil, this plan just might work.
20. The young fighter had a hungry look, like the kind you get from
not eating for a while.
21. Her artistic sense was exquisitely refined, like someone who can
tell butter from I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.
22. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog
makes just before it throws up.
23. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated
because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a
surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.
24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around
with power tools.
25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells,
as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
26. It came down the stairs looking very much like something no one
had ever seen before.
those are good tebs
They made me laugh ..............
like ...oh funnily enough......like a garbage truck backing up ...
It's a problem with my sinus
I try not to do it with small children in the room as it makes them cry
My favourite was...... "She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up"
What makes me laugh is the quote made by Lord Flashheart (Rik Mayall) in the first episode of Blackadder II (where Blackadder was going to marry Bob/Kate):
"She's got a tongue like an electric eel and she likes the taste of man's tonsils"
I'm your only friend
I'm not your only friend
But I'm a little glowing friend
But really I'm not actually your friend
But I am
|bad, eclipse, free, hacker, law, lost, mail, screen, share, sound, speed, tools|